Losing Things

And no, I'm not talking about keys. Or shoes. Or children...

Something A and I have been realising recently is what goes missing when things like anxiety or Sadness come to play in your house. There are the fairly obvious ones like "enjoyment" or "get up and go" but the one we have come to notice the most in the past few weeks is creativity.

I have barely picked up any knitting or crochet in about six months. Six months of cold weather at that (having a six month break from cuddling wool during a long hot summer (let me dream) is less surprising).

I don't constantly have something or other ticking away in my mind that I want to be writing, be it blog post, novel, poem, prayer, sermon...whatever.

I don't have the random moments of lunacy where I believe that overnight I have developed incredible artistic skills and can suddenly draw/paint/create beautiful things with ease and serenity.

I have been baking but only as a way of getting the maximum amount of chocolate into my system as possible...

Cooking has been similarly (mostly) just about getting fed.

I am having little teeny tiny wishes with some of these areas now and that is likely to be what has made us notice how lacking they have been. I don't think it is a change I can really force myself but I will be keeping my eyes open for any signs of life.